Push Out of Your Comfort Zone3 Reasons You Should Always Network

Okay, I admit it, I do not love going to a party or event where I do not know anyone and making new friends. Yes, I speak about networking, encourage people to network, and do believe that if you build your network, you will change your life. All of that is true, but it still does not mean I love to do it.

Every spring my husband and I go away, just the two of us. We make it a holiday just for ourselves. We head to our beach place in Charleston, South Carolina and ride bikes, play golf, walk the beach and just have fun and relax. For us, this has become a tradition and one that we look forward to every year. We refer to it as the perfect weekend, and this perfect weekend always ends with a Member’s Party at our Country Club.

This black-tie event, put on by the club, is quite the party. Every member of the club is invited, and the entire event is courteous of our club. It is so much fun! All the women and men dressed to the nine’s. The food and cocktails are amazing and endless! The best part, however, is the band, always the perfect blend of shag, rock-n-roll and pop music. We eat, drink and dance all night long.

Even though we belong to this club, we spend about ten long weekends a year at our beach place; my husband and I do not know anyone at the club. Other than our “Spring Getaway” trip, we are usually down there with friends or family, and that entertaining prevents us from socializing or picking up golf game with other club members.

For that reason, the first thirty minutes of this Member Party is always a bit awkward. As soon as the doors open and the crowd gathers, the members, grab a cocktail and start to socialize, all the members that are but us. Naturally, because most of these people know each other they begin to engage and talk immediately, leaving my husband and me to stand to talk, awkwardly, to just one another. If it were up to me, sorry to say, this awkward conversation would last most of the night, but not for Rob (my husband) he is quick to push us out of our comfort zone.

Every year, before we can get the first cocktail down, Rob is out there introducing us to other members, asking questions, and as I like to call it “making new friends.” He is so good at it; even when we see a member we recognize from prior years, he will say hello, make polite conversation, and then pull me along to meet new people.

This year, Rob struck gold. Within five minutes of being at this event, he introduced us to a couple of members who turned out to be a blast. They asked us to sit with them, which we did, and then four of their friends filled out the table. The entire group was fun, interesting and best of all loved to dance. We had such a good time; we stayed until the end, and closed the place down!

As we headed to the car, I told my husband “thank you”! The entire evening was so much fun, and it would never have happened if not for him. See, I was so focused on not bothering people, convincing myself they all knew each other and did not want to make new friends. It was Rob who pushed us out of our comfort zone, and Rob who ensured we reaped the benefits of networking.

What We Gained:

  1. More Fun – believe me, I love spending time with my husband, but at a party, you want to be with people. This was so much more fun, laughing, telling stories, and just enjoying a great night with more people.
  2. Connections – turns out everyone we met was a great connection. One man does much work in the financial services events world, which is a terrific connection for me. My husband met two guys who love to fly fish, which is his passion. Also, every couple there are regular shag and salsa dancers, so they gave us great tips on where to do that in the area.
  3. Friends – We are reaching a point where we want to spend more time at our beach place, and it is great to now have friends that we can play golf with, have dinner with, and oh yes go dancing with.

This all-time to me a powerful lesson about why, even when I do not feel like it, I need to push out of my comfort zone… So to help you do it too, here are three easy steps on how to do it.

How To Push Out Of Your Comfort Zone

  1. Find A Reason – find a reason to go up and talk to people, something to say. I had mentioned to my husband that I recognized that couple from previous years, and they were great dancers. He took that and ran with it. By starting off with a comment, especially a compliment, which is an easy way to get the conversation flowing.
  2. Ask Questions – from there ask questions – do you live down here full-time? How long have you been members? Have you been to this event before? Open-ended questions get people talking, and give you an opportunity to find common ground. We quickly learned the one gentleman was a fly fisherman, and his wife writes books like me.
  3. Just Do It – the hardest part is getting started, so don’t think about it. Just take a deep breath and do it.

Yes, this was the perfect escape and anniversary weekend. I was thankful for many things, the time away, the gorgeous weather, and a husband with the guts to push out of his (or should I say, my) comfort zone.